we're having a get together on easter. not for the kids. it's an adult thing. eggs are filled with meat loaf. the kids aren't interested. yes, he rose from the dead. no, he's not a zombie. i don't know why we hide eggs, just put them in the basket. someone needs to come up with an app that marks exactly where you hid all your eggs. that way if you lose one, you don't have to move out of the house three weeks later. did you take your son is benji to see the easter bunny yet? >> yes, yes. >> where did you take him? >> to the topanga mall. >> jimmy: did he like the easter bunny? >> no, he was crying. >> jimmy: how many months old is your son now? >> 16 months. >> jimmy: and what does he weigh right now? >> 32. but he lost two pounds. >> jimmy: you know, he's not a

pinata, you don't have to stuff him with candy. >> i know. >> jimmy: anyway, every year parents hand their kids over to what appears to be a giant rodent. most kids hate it. but we thought it would be fun to play a game called easter bunny's lap or vaccination. what you have to do here is guess whether the child you see on screen is visiting the easter bunny or getting vaccination shots. all right? here we go. all right, easter bunny or vaccination. >> easter bunny. >> let's have a look. it is -- no, vaccination. next one. easter bunny or vaccination? >> easter bunny. and -- you're 0-2 so far. next one, easter bunny? >> easter bunny. >> jimmy: because how many vak

nati -- vaccinations are we going to do in a row. easter bunny or vaccinations? the audience says easter bunny. it is an easter bunny. all right, you're getting better. next? all right, let's find out. it is a vaccination. a couple more. easter bunny or vaccination? >> easter bunny? >> jimmy: it is the easter bunny. oh, wow, everybody is crying. one more, easter bunny or vaccination. vaccination? let's find out. it is both. might as well let the easter bunny give vaccinations. all right, are you ready for what might be the video of the year? let me get my peeps cannon out. this happened at grocery store in redding is, california.

a man approaches the store front, makes sure the coast is clear. here comes the man. finds that there's nobody inside. then he dawns a disguise and returns to the store. tries to throw a rock through the window. and scampers off into the nigh . i guess george clooney and brad pitt won't be asking him to join the gang for "oceans 14." that's got everything you could ask for in a web video. let's watch it again. one more time. all right, there he is. hello. he looks around. now the mask. i always put the mask on first. it's just my thing. he appears to be disoriented.

and then he leaves. you know, he had a solid plan he just didn't execute it properly. the first surveillance footage to be on "america's most wanted" and "america's funniest home videos" at the same time. the suspect is wanted for attempted robbery. this happened a month ago. they have yet to find the guy. so be on the lookout for the only man in america who wears a pair of xxx polka dot sweat pants. he's already wanted by the fashs police. if you recognize that man, please contact them and if y you -- wait a minute. nicely done. [ applause ] >> jimmy: if you want to steal something, this is how you do it. an 8-year-old girl told her mom

and dad that her little brother kept stealing her pillow pet. they set up a camera. and this is what they saw. this is their 2-year-old son. his name is kyle. he's now sneaking out into the hall and he's using fingernail clippers to pick -- this little mcgyver is actually picking the lot and enters. but before he enters, he goes back to hide the nail clippers. then he enters the room, closes the door in case anyone is watching from the hall and a few seconds later, he claims his prize. what a kid, huh? i think this is how lex luthor

started. all babies are thieves and cannot be trusted. walmart is about to start testing an interesting new delivery method for customers that order online. they're asking shoppers -- now, these are people in the store to drop stuff off for other shoppers on their way home. and in exchange for delivering the packages, walmart would give them a discount on their bill. so if you always wanted to work for walmart but didn't want to get bogged down with the paycheck and health care, this is the plan for you. here's how it works. you go online and order something. let's say you order a can of pringles on line. they could give the pringles to the customer and then the customer would bring the pringles, bring the package directly to your home or your workplace, wherever you are. but just make sure you're home because people do get angry when they don't know what to do. but it's a fine idea. original. it's like fedex if fedex drove a

'92 corolla and ate half your chips ahoy. if walmart can get the program off the ground, it could make them competitive with amazon. and that's only one of many new ways they're looking to cut costs. >> also watt mart, -- walmart, finding great new ways to save. can't find a sales associate? just grab a uniform and chip in for a few hours. don't see what you want? it might be in our basement. go check. and while you're down there, why not bring up a few boxes and stock a few shelves. and would you mind grabbing the garbage on the way out? thanks, dummy. walmart, low prices are just the beginning. doing our work is the rest. why not? this is a great new product. if this commercial was any

indication, this is an all new way to eat eggs. >> making eggs makes a mess. they stick to the pan. they flop when you flip. and the yolks always drip. after you cook them up, there's all that clean-up. what you need is the rollie egg master. the best easy fan three way to make perfect eggs every time. it cooks your eggs just like a real pan without all the butter, fat and mess. look at that. and what makes rollie eggs is their new easy to eat shape. >> it's a perfect product for anyone who is barely capable of functioning. if you love popsicles but wish they were rubbery and warm. between this and the easter bunny, it's a very hard time for eggs. billionaire bill gates has an

interesting new project. the bill and melinda gates foundation has an initiative they call grand grand challenges in global health. they grant money to inventors to come up with solutions to global health issues. right now they're offering $100,000 for what they call the next generation condom. they're challenging people to invent a condom that enhances pleasure instead of reducing it. the idea being that men will be more likely to use them if they feel good. which means bill gates is the world's greatest philanthropist or the world's biggest pervert. and should the guy whose software company notorious for vetting viruses be in charge of contraception? unfortunately this challenge might be a little too late. because the next generation condom has already been invented. >> j&d food is creating bacon sun screen and bacon condoms. as an added bonus, each bacon

condom has been generously coated with bacon lube. a bacon flavored personal lubricant here for only $9.99, you can be one of the first ones to get them. >>. >> jimmy: what do you think? you know where would be a great place to put a bacon condom? >> the new easy to eat shape. >> jimmy: when we come back, this week unnecessary censorship, plus dwayne johnson, saoirse ronan and music from kendrick lamar.

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>> jimmy: welcome back. it was a big day for college basketball. the ncaa tournament is if full swing. we finally move to the part of the tournament that doesn't involve tru tv. they knocksed 68 teams down to 16 teams in a week. are you listening, "dancing with the stars" and "american idol"? it can be done. two teams from the acc made the sweet 16. they' been covering this extensively on the acc network, as you might imagine. this is an outtake they posted to their youtube channel. the worst thing that would

possibly happen to a person named hogwood happened. >> how long before you do this? >> are you all right? >> i'm good, i'm good. >> the story is, if you're a fat guy this week, stay in bed. i like to take a moment to wish lady gaga a happy birthday. 27 years ago today, lady gaga was born when elton john and a unicorn simultaneously sneezed into a bucket of glitter pens. i came up with what i believe is the perfect gift. i got her a gift card to the gap. no? a 17-year-old kid from the united kingdom just sold an app he created to yahoo for $30 million. by the way, can you imagine that sentence making any sense to your great grandparents. the kid created an app called

sumly. it summarizes news articles automatically. he created it when he was 15 and then after only two years of woorking on it, sold it for $30 million. the same thing happened to me when i was 17. only instead of selling a app to yahoo for $30 million. i sold parachute pants at millers outpost for $3.35 an hour. obviously this is a major accomplishment for a kid his age. in fact, for comparison sakes, we went out on to hollywood boulevard today to ask some american teenagers what is your greatest accomplishment? what's your greatest accomplishment? >> skateboarding. >> what's your greatest accomplishment? >> marching band in high school. >> getting a good result on my math test. >> i play hockey and one time i

checked a kid and knocked him out. >> i don't know, i drank yellow paint. is that an accomplishment? >> me and my brother collect corks, like bottle cap corks and we have a couple hundred in our rooms upstairs. that's pretty good accomplish. of mine. i like to think. >> what's your greatest accomplishment? >> as of right now, i have all the pokemons right now. >> how many are there? >> 659 total including the five that have been released. six have been released since x and y. so in october, i'll have to start again. >> jimmy: i don't think i believe that children are our future anymore. one more thing, it's thursday night, time for our weekly tribute to the sec where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. it's this week in unnecessary

censorship. >> making hitz headlines for bleep his own [ bleep ] to make some cash. >> time to reveal your favorite [ bleep ]er, oh, yeah. >> one thing you do well is [ bleep ] from behind. good luck in the second half. >> atop the leader board this week, we have a whole [ bleep ] of dancing to come. >> will someone please tell kim she's pregnant? what the [ bleep ]. >> data from cell phone companies can be used to [ bleep ] your life. >> i've been [ bleep ] around close to 150 times. >> i saw a youtube video of giraffes [ bleep ]ing. >> we arranged for that. >> it's a new meaning for [ bleep ]. >> i heard they kick. >> [ bleep ] swinging back and forth. >> [ bleep ] he was afraid of ours -- >> do not [ bleep ] around with mother nature. >> welcome back. here's a question for you. did you [ bleep ] this morning?

>> our private show we have here. they are part of that. and you can have the opportunity to be able to put your [ bleep ] inside one of their mouths and [ bleep ] them. >> jimmy: saoirse ronan is here. we'll be right back with dwayne johnson. don't go anywhere. ♪music playing >> go to youtube to find out how you can do more. dad, there's something better for dinner than that.

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tonight on the program, her movie, "the host" -- which it turns out is not about me -- comes out tomorrow. saoirse ronan is here. she is from ireland. and then with music from this album called "good kid, mad city," kendrick lamar from the sony outdoor stage. [ cheers and applause ] we've got a strong lineup for you next week. shaquille o'neal will be here, as will russell brand, bill maher, bob costas, giancarlo esposito, from "red widow," goran visnjic and music from demi lovato, gary allan and cold war kids. so join us. our first guest is an international film star and one of the few members of the screen actors' guild who can elbow smash sir anthony hopkins into submission.

starting today, you can see him in 3d as a very large man named roadblock in "g.i. joe: retaliation." please say hello to dwayne johnson. [ cheers and applause ] some g.i. joe you are. how you doing? >> i'm doing good. >> jimmy: you're finally in

shape, that's good. >> i try to. those muscle softeners are really working these days. >> jimmy: what's your edregimen? what do you do? >> right now there's double duty going on right now. i'm preparing for wrestlemania coming up next sunday. [ applause ] very excited about that. so the prep has been for about 12 to 14 weeks of prepping for wrestlemania, and also prepping for a movie role i have coming up, which i will shoot in budapest in may called -- let me get it out. getting ready to slam it down. "hercules." >> jimmy: oh, hercules. you can't be a chubby hercules. >> no, you can't be a chubby hercules. you need to work the part. >> jimmy: are you on one of those crazy diets on top of it? >> i get up at probably 4:00 in the morning. i do one of two workouts. then i eat breakfast and then

i'll go training on the weights. then the diet is very, very detailed. i have a great diet and conditioning coach. about seven meals a day, every couple of hours. there's no fat in the diet right no uh. it's a balance between protein and carbohydrates and greens. >> jimmy: i love the seven meals a day part of it. the rest sounds terrible. especially the 4:00 in the morning workout. >> isn't that fun? >> jimmy: that is not fun at all. not fun at all. can't you have the guy come a little later? it seems ridiculous. >> well, no. i train myself. >> jimmy: oh, you're training yourself? >> yes, yes. nobody trains me. >> jimmy: oh, really? i guess after years of -- yeah. >> nobody is waking me up at 4:00. >> jimmy: what drives you? oh, i had -- you know, you want to fight john cena but you probably already know what's going to win, right? i mean -- >> well, i think i might know. that's the thing, i might know. and i always say, you know, if i -- here's the thing.

if i lose, god, it's phony. if i win, it's so real. >> jimmy: you remember your first wrestling match? when was that? >> i do. my very first wrestling match was in 1996, and generally when guys or girls, they start wrestling, they generally wrestle in -- they start in high school gyms in front of 20 people. i had my very first match in corpus christi, texas, at a monday night raw before they went live on the air in front of 15,000 people. >> jimmy: that was your first match? >> my very first match. >> jimmy: wow. >> i wrestled a guy named the brooklyn brawler. great guy. >> jimmy: do you keep in touch with brooklyn? >> i see brooklyn, yes. he's doing very good. i see him all the time. and my very first match, so they give me a call and they say come in, we want you to have your match. they thought i had actually had matches before. but i never worked before. the wwe thought that. i never wrestled before and i had no trunks, no boots, nothing.

>> jimmy: you wrestled naked? [ applause ] >> jimmy: no wonder you're so fabulous. >> i earned the nickname the rock. yes. >> jimmy: were you the rock right away? >> no, no, no. i was actually -- i was just dwayne johnson going out. so right before i went out -- i had to borrow trunks and boots from somebody. went that night and right before i'm getting ready to go out behind the curtain. i said to one of the producers i said do i have rung mizic? i was living a dream at that point. he says do you want some? yeah, sure. i'm thinking it's going to be cool or hip hop. it was this horse [ bleep ] techno music. it was so terrible. it starts playing. i go out, and as loud as the music is in events like that, right? over the music you always hear "you suck!"

"go back to miami!" >> that's not the kind of music that goes over in corpus christi, i guess. you performed in front of tough crowds when you were wrestling. >> at that type, by the way, i had my very first match event. they say you've got a lot of potential, but you're just not ready for the big show. you have to start at the bottom. so i had to move to nashville, tennessee. i wrestled there. and starting at the bottom meant every night i would wrestle in flea markets. i would wrestle in used car dealerships. i would wrestle in barns, real barns where people are sitting -- >> jimmy: what kind of people come to barns to watch wrestling? >> doctors, lawyers. stuff like that. yeah. the kind where they have been -- there's been a lot of moon shine throughout the day. so by the time you get there, these flea markets or barns, there's no security or guard gate or anything like that. so it was a bitch to try to just

get to the ring. because you would actually have to go through the people. going through the people, as you can imagine was, that's where you get -- i have scars all over my head. you get hit with batteries. i've been cut with exacto knives. >> jimmy: aaa, i hope. what kind of maniacs? >> i was lucky. >> jimmy: well, it worked out all right, i guess. we're going to take a break. when we come back, we're going to look at your new movie called "g.i. joe: retaliate." in basketball, is doing two things at the same time better than doing one thing? [ all ] yes! give me an example. like uh in pickle and a roll? like a pick and roll? like a pickle roll. like a pickle roll? no no no no. what's a pickle roll in basketball? you kick the pickle

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>> let me get this straight. one whole weekend, you looking after my little girl. look, i love you kids, i do. but they live to terrorize me. if you win, you have to take your next promotion. >> no, we're not doing that. that's not going to count. >> i bought my little girls a karaoke machine and they love singing on it all night long. make shoor yo

make sure your bring your ear plugs. >> jimmy: "g.i. joe: retaliation." you make a very cute couple together. >> channing is -- he is apparently the world's most sexiest man. >> yeah, he's the sexiest man alive. that's what they say. >> he is, he is. we make a great couple, right? >> do you mention that to him frequently? that he's the sexiest man alive? >> i try to. but i get lost in his eyes. >> that's the problem. >> it is very difficult. >> it's difficult. >> bruce willis is here last night. seems like you guys must have hit it off. for years now, so to be in this movie together was great. i always like to see this about bruce. when i first broke into acting. when i got into acting -- >> jimmy: he shaved your head?

>> he shaved my chest, yes. and my arms. and then my head. jimmy, we bonded. >> jimmy: what did he do? >> he was just so supportive. and even publicly supportive of my transition. and he -- >> jimmy: oh, that's nice. people are skeptical when you come from the world of wrestling. it's like what? you know. there's a lot of act going on there. there is. >> skeptical of anybody who feels like they're trying to cash in on their success somehow. and a celebrity by then just going to hollywood. maybe they get a reality show or tv show or maybe they make it to the big screen. so there was a lot of skepticism at first when i broke in. he was one of the first that publicly said give him a shot, i think he's got something. when i met him, we stat down, we had dinner. he said look, stay focused and work your ass off and you're

going to make it. i'll never forget that and i appreciate it. >> the thing you showed me on the phone. i want to have a look at that. >> my diet is so strict, but of course, you've got to have cheat meals, and with cheat meals -- >> jimmy: how often do you have that? >> probably every eight weeks or so. but it's a cheat day. starts off with pancakes in the morning. my girlfriend makes these amazing brown knee brownies for. but there's this pizza place. i get four pizzas but they're not regular pizzas. it's double the dough. i know, it's a lot. and that, my friend is the picture. >> jimmy: and you ate all of these pizzas by yourself? >> i will dominate. >> jimmy: that is ridiculous. >> that's how you do it guys.

if you want to have a body like dwayne's, you've got to eat four pizzas. double dough. >> and you've got to make that face. >> jimmy: and thanks for this phone, by the way. be right back with saoirs saoirse ronan. [ male announcer ] ah, would you look at that? a couple of retired coaches putting aside their college hoops differences to split an app and 2 entrees for just 20 bucks. look at them bonding over the "jazzed-up" flavor of those new bourbon street entrees. just when i think people can't overcome their petty differences. yes! in your face, knight! [ male announcer ] nevermind. you've got anger issues. that's not how you throw a chair. [ male announcer ] only the best make our famous 2 for $20 menu, like the new creamy cajun steak & shrimp and cajun shrimp pasta. a great deal for game day or every day. see you tomorrow.

all eas or tax attorneys.cpas a great deal for game day or every day. plus, we've got experts to support you all year round. and they're ready now. turbotax. ♪ ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] get sweep. and get email that keeps your inbox in order, automatically.

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>> jimmy: our next guest is one of a very few people to earn an academy award nomination before she was old enough to drive. her new movie is called "the host." it opens in theatres tomorrow. please welcome saoirse ronan. ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: be very careful because the bunny spews peeps at a high velocity. >> i know. i was very jealous actually. i'm glad he's out here. >> jimmy: we'll do some talking then you can shoot some peeps into the audience. >> i never heard of peeps before. i have never seen peeps before. they look disgusting. >> jimmy: they are disgusting. but they're kind of the glue that holds this country together. especially around this time of year. >> very important yellow rabbit. >> jimmy: a traditional thing. do you have cadbury eggs over -- >> yes. >> jimmy: those are disgusting? >> no, they're not. they're lovely. >> jimmy: there you go. that's just the difference between our countries. you've got a brown -- now, i'm sure they taste good. i have never eventen one because they disturb me. you take this brown thing and crack it and there's this egg inside. >> to be honest, i'm never into easter eggs.

at home, you get literally, you know, 15 chocolate easter eggs and i never -- >> jimmy: you get 15 eggs. >> yeah. you would get roughly 15 eggs. >> jimmy: i'm going to kill my parents. we would usually get like one chocolate egg and then a bunch of plastic eggs that each had three jelly beans and green grass. then my mother started doing weird things like putting t-shirts in the basket and like, you know, razor blades and stuff. not to hur t us but to shave with. >> what age were you? >> jimmy: let's see, it was last easter. i was 44. that's true, i still get an easter basket from my mom. it's embarrassing. did i pronounce your name correctly? saoirse? >> yes. that's amazing. so many people get it wrong. >> jimmy: the spelling is

insane. there's, like, numbers, a pound sign. spell your names for those who don't know how it's spelled. >> s-a-o-i-r-s-e. it's silly. >> jimmy: what's the worst butchering you've heard of your name? >> there's been loads. i think -- i mean, i've had, you know, sorsey. i think the worst was suarez. it's quite exotic. >> jimmy: it's quite mexican sounding. >> if you thought it was a name, clearly i wouldn't be called suarez. >> jimmy: what do you do at starbucks? i homage what they would write on your cup. >> i never give them my name because it's going to be so difficult for them. i give them my mom's name. monica. >> jimmy: your mother has a normal name and she gave you a hard name. what's your father's name?

>> his name is paul. i could give them monica, i could give them jill. >> jimmy: what does your name mean? >> it means freedom. it's an irish word. it eers so it's sort of like an irish slogan. it means freedom and liberty. >> jimmy: unless you're the parents who want to tell you you can't go to a party. and you say my name is freedom! >> i know. >> jimmy: this movie that you're in, it's based on a book written by stephenie meyer who wrote the twilight series. i'm telling the audience. i know you know this. are you prepared for the lunacy that surrounds anything that this woman touches? people go nuts. they start tattoos your face on their babies and stuff like that. i mean, it is -- you know, it can potentially be crazy. do you feel prepared for that?

>> no. i don't. i don't know if it's going to reach that level. i think, you know, twilight was so huge. it really was such a phenomenon that i think, you know, even though there are other franchises around at the moment to reach that kind of level, i think it's going to be a while before that happens. i don't feel like it's going to happen with this, which isn't a bad thing at all. >> jimmy: seems like it does happen, we should train you on how to use a peeps cannon. do you want to give it a try? >> yes. go ahead and grab that. just imagine it's a dead animal. >> he's very cute. it's very heavy. do you see that button? >> i don't want to hit anyone, though. >> jimmy: they want you to hit them. >> jimmy: do we have any more peeps? they're coming out. here come the peeps guys.

put him in quick! load it! >> jimmy: this is really somewhat obscene. get ready. >> jimmy: now don't press that button right now or i'm going to be blind. >> you ready? >> jimmy: freedom, everyone! "the host" opens in theatres tomorrow. we'll be right back with kendrick lamar!

>> jimmy: his album is called "good kid, mad city." here with the song, "poetic justice," kendrick lamar. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ every second every minute man i swear that she can get it ♪ ♪ say if you a bad chick put your hands up high hands up high hands up high ♪

what's up, how you all doing? ♪ tell 'em dim the lights now right now put me in the mood ♪ ♪ i'm talkin 'bout dark room perfume m ♪ kendrick ♪ i recognize your fragrance hold up you ain't never gotta say boo m ♪ and i know your taste is a little bit mmm high maintenance ♪ ♪ everybody else basic you live life on an everyday basis ♪ ♪ with poetic justice poetic justice ♪ ♪ if i told you that a flower bloomed in a dark room would you trust it ♪ ♪ i mean i write poems in these songs dedicated to you when ♪ ♪ you're in the mood for empathy cause blood in my pen ♪ ♪ better yet with your friends and them i really wanna know who you are ♪ ♪ i really wanna show you off bump that pour up plenty of champagne ♪ ♪ for nights when you cursed this name ♪ ♪ you called up your girlfriends and ya'll told

them that little bitty range i heard that ♪ ♪ she wanna go and party she wanna go and party homie don't approach her with that atari ♪ ♪ boy that ain't good game homie sorry ♪ ♪ they say conversation rule the nation i can tell ♪ ♪ but i can never write my wrongs unless i write 'em down for real p.s. ♪ ♪ you can get it you can get it you can get it you can get it ♪ ♪ and i know just know just know just know just ♪ ♪ know just what you want poetic justice put it in a song all right ♪ you can get it you can get it you can get it you can get it ♪ ♪ and i know just know just know just know just ♪ ♪ know just what you want poetic justice put it in a song all right m ♪ i really hope you play this 'cause ol' girl you test my patience ♪ ♪ with all these seductive photographs and all these one off vacations you've been takin' ♪ ♪ clearly a lot for me to take in it don't make sense ♪ ♪ young east african girl you too busy with your other man ♪

♪ i was trying to put you on game, put you on a plane take you and your mama to the motherland ♪ ♪ i could do it ♪ maybe one day when you figure out you're gonna need someone ♪ ♪ when you figure out it's all right here in the city and you don't run from where we come from ♪ ♪ that sound like poetic justice poetic justice ♪ ♪ you were so new to this life but damn you got adjusted ♪ ♪ i mean i write poems in these songs dedicated to the fun sex ♪ ♪ your natural hair and your soft skin and your big ass in that sundress ♪ ♪ good god what you doing that walk for ♪ ♪ when i see that thing move i just wish we would fight less and we would talk more ♪ ♪ and they say communication saves relations i can tell ♪ ♪ but i can never write my wrongs unless i write 'em down for real p.s. ♪ ♪ you can get it you can get it you can get it you can get it ♪ ♪ and i know just know just know just know just ♪ ♪ know just what you want poetic justice put it in a song all right m ♪ you can get it you can get it you can get it you can get it ♪

♪ and i know just know just know just know just ♪ ♪ know just what you want poetic justice put it in a song all right m ♪ every time i write these words they become a taboo ♪ ♪ makin' sure my punctuation curve every letter here's true ♪ ♪ livin' my life in the margin and that metaphor was proof ♪ ♪ i'm talkin' poetic justice poetic justice ♪ ♪ if i told you that a flower bloomed in a dark room would you trust it ♪ >> jimmy: i want to thank dwayne johnson, saoirse ronan. apologies to matt damon. we ran out of time. "nightline" is next. thanks for watching! good night. tonight on "nightline" -- runway rebel. shs