106
106
Feb 9, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
quote
eye 106
favorite 0
quote 3
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ >> carson: hey, everybody. carson daly here to guide you through yet another edition of "last call." we're at the roger room for night two of sundance week, during which we're dedicating our "spotlight" segment to films featured at this year's sundance film festival. tonight, it's all about a documentary 13 years in the making, the story of "american promise" is coming up. our music tonight is great. we turn the lear
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ >> carson: hey, everybody. carson daly here to guide you through yet another edition of "last call." we're at the roger room for night two of sundance week, during which we're dedicating our "spotlight" segment to films featured at this year's sundance film festival. tonight, it's all about a documentary 13 years in the making, the story of "american...
1,405
1.4K
Feb 19, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
quote
eye 1,405
favorite 0
quote 3
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, hey, everybody! thank you very much! that's a great new york city crowd right there. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. oh, great! we've got a big show tonight, it's gonna be fun. looking forward to it. [ cheers and applause ] welcome. thank you for being here. here's what people are talking about. the white house's immigration plan was leaked over the weekend and florida senator marco rubio is already calling it dead on arrival. [ light laughter ] which, incidentally, is also florida's state motto. [ laughter ] i don't know why. it's a beautiful state. but unfortunate. yeah. this is cool. yesterday nba legend michael jordan turned 50 years old. [ cheers and applause ]
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, hey, everybody! thank you very much! that's a great new york city crowd right there. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. oh, great! we've got a big show tonight, it's gonna be fun. looking forward to it. [ cheers and applause ] welcome. thank you for being here. here's what people are talking about. the white...
135
135
Feb 9, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
quote
eye 135
favorite 0
quote 3
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! thank you. welcome. that's a new york city crowd. very exciting. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." [ cheers and applause ] i am your host, jimmy fallon, and i hope that you're in a good mood because we could all be stuck here together for a few days. [ cheers and applause ] might happen. sleepover. it's a sleepover. >> steve: yay! >> jimmy: everybody's talking about this big winter storm that could dump three feet of snow on the east coast and knock out power to 24 million people. to put things in perspective, that's about six beyonce halftime shows. [ laughter ] the storm is a big deal. in fact, i heard the weather channel is expecting totals of
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! thank you. welcome. that's a new york city crowd. very exciting. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." [ cheers and applause ] i am your host, jimmy fallon, and i hope that you're in a good mood because we could all be stuck here together for a few days. [ cheers and applause ] might happen. sleepover. it's a sleepover....
784
784
Feb 7, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 784
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much, everyone. welcome. welcome! thank you for coming. thank you for watching. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. how you feeling tonight? feeling good? [ cheers and applause ] here's what people are talking about. today, the postal service announced that it will stop delivering mail on saturdays in an effort to save $2 billion a year. postal workers were shocked. they were like, "we were supposed to deliver mail on saturdays?" [ laughter ] did you hear about this? peta is criticizing beyonce for the leather costume she wore during the super bowl halftime show. or as the ball got kicked and thrown for three solid hours -- but, yeah, that's the leather you should be worried about. [ laughter and applause ] "am i nothing?" [ light laughter ] yup, peta is mad at beyonce for her leather costume, but even cows are like, "oh, come on, she looked awesome." can't we all agree? [ laughter ] this isn't good, you guys. they
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much, everyone. welcome. welcome! thank you for coming. thank you for watching. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. how you feeling tonight? feeling good? [ cheers and applause ] here's what people are talking about. today, the postal service announced that it will stop delivering mail on saturdays in...
140
140
Feb 16, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 140
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: hello. [ cheers and applause ] good to see everybody. welcome to "the tonight show." hope you all had a nice valentine's day. you know it's interesting, they say people like to get kinky on valentine's day, try different things. like, last night the clippers spanked the lakers. did you see that? here's something. i'm in a store today and i notice -- you know where the greeting cards are? you ever notice when you shop for greeting cards, there are cards that say happy belated birthday, happy belated anniversary? you ever notice there are no cards that say happy belated valentine's day. that's 'cause there is no recovery from that. you miss valentine's day, there is no happy anything ever again. you're just screwed, totally screwed. actually, my wife and i had a a pretty romantic valentine's day. you know what we did? we sat in a port-a-potty and pretended we were c
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: hello. [ cheers and applause ] good to see everybody. welcome to "the tonight show." hope you all had a nice valentine's day. you know it's interesting, they say people like to get kinky on valentine's day, try different things. like, last night the clippers spanked the lakers. did you see that? here's something. i'm in a store today and i...
149
149
Feb 12, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 149
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you! welcome, everybody. thank you so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." today, pope benedict surprised everyone and announced that he is stepping down at the end of the month. or as god put it, "well, at least he gave me two weeks notice." [ laughter ] yep, pope benedict is resigning. and you know what that means. hillary in 2013? we can make it work, people. the pope said he plans to enjoy his privacy and quietly embrace his golden years. just kidding. he's going on "dancing with the stars." [ laughter ] there's actually been an outpouring of support from the pope's followers on twitter. but the most surprising thing was the twitter exchange he had with the dalai lama. take a look. first, the dalai lama tweeted at the pope, "geez, you ran out of steam quick. i've been dalai lama for 55 years. #cantstopwontstop." [ laughter ] very interesting. >> steve: rude. >> jimmy: then, the pope tweeted, "i guess being the pope is a lot h
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you! welcome, everybody. thank you so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." today, pope benedict surprised everyone and announced that he is stepping down at the end of the month. or as god put it, "well, at least he gave me two weeks notice." [ laughter ] yep, pope benedict is resigning. and you know what...
205
205
Feb 16, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 205
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. thank you so much. everybody, welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." thank you so much for being here. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] going to be a fun show tonight. going to be fun. here's what people are talking about. we have a three day weekend coming up, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] and good news. good news, i checked the weather report, and it's going to be sunny with a chance of meteors from space. [ laughter ] everybody is talking about this 11-ton meteor that crashed into central russia this morning. it sent shock waves across six cities and caused a lot of damage, or as people from russia put it, at least we weren't stuck on that carnival cruise. [ laughter ] i mean that was -- that sounds -- have you heard about that carnival cruise thing? it's awful. it gets worse. well, they lost power for four days, right. the passengers are fine. but after they got off the s
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. thank you so much. everybody, welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." thank you so much for being here. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] going to be a fun show tonight. going to be fun. here's what people are talking about. we have a three day weekend coming up, you...
771
771
Feb 6, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 771
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i feel the love right there. that's a great new york city crowd. welcome. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." thank you so much for being here. here's what people are talking about, you guys. the white house is warning north korea that it will face significant consequences if it moves forward with a new round of nuclear tests. not only that, it's also warning south korea that it will face serious consequences if psy makes another ad for pistachios. [ laughter ] ♪ [ cheers ] that's so last week. [ laughter ] here's some political news. mitt romney's son tagg -- tagg. [ laughter ] >> steve: you're it. >> jimmy: he is denying reports that he will run for senate this year saying the timing isn't right. just like when his dad tries to clap along to a song. ♪ celebrate good times come on celebrate ♪ ♪ celebrate good times come on ♪ [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no one does that. >> steve: nobody does that in the world. >> jimmy: yo
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i feel the love right there. that's a great new york city crowd. welcome. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." thank you so much for being here. here's what people are talking about, you guys. the white house is warning north korea that it will face significant consequences if it moves forward with a new round of...
108
108
Feb 8, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 108
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm talking about. hey! that's a great new york city crowd right there. welcome. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." yeah. it's going to be a fun show tonight. love this. you guys -- [ cheers ] welcome. welcome to the show. here's what people are talking about. the northeast is bracing for a snow storm this weekend. boy, oh, boy. some forecasters say that it will only be two inches while other forecasters are predicting 30 inches. [ laughter ] when asked why they couldn't make a better prediction, meteorologists were like, "uh, we're meteorologists." [ laughter ] actually, they are saying new york could receive up to 12 inches of snow this weekend, or as subway calls it, 11 inches. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that's good, yeah. ♪ i'm so excited. we have joel mchale on the show tonight. >> steve: oh! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we also have al roker. [ cheers and applause ] roker was going to be t
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm talking about. hey! that's a great new york city crowd right there. welcome. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." yeah. it's going to be a fun show tonight. love this. you guys -- [ cheers ] welcome. welcome to the show. here's what people are talking about. the northeast is bracing for a snow...
385
385
Feb 21, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 385
favorite 0
quote 0
captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome! that is a great crowd, right there. thank you so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. oh, my gosh. we have a fun show tonight. welcome, everybody. [ cheers ] here's what people are talking about. i guess to appeal to a younger audience, this year's academy awards are just being referred to as the oscars. [ light laughter ] that's what i heard, yeah, and to appeal to an even younger audience, they're spelling oscar with a "z." [ light laughter ] yeah, and backwards in crayon. >> steve: yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. that's right, the oscars are just four days away and experts are saying the movie "argo" is the favorite to win best picture. [ cheers and applause ] i'll be happy with that. with "lincoln" a close second. yeah, and the favorite for worst picture is still this -- it's my high school photo. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] "weirdo unchained." >> steve: or "zero dork thirty." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i tried to grow a mustache. [ squ
captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome! that is a great crowd, right there. thank you so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. oh, my gosh. we have a fun show tonight. welcome, everybody. [ cheers ] here's what people are talking about. i guess to appeal to a younger audience, this year's academy awards are just being referred to as the oscars. [ light laughter ]...
189
189
Feb 23, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 189
favorite 0
quote 0
iversal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome, everybody. come on. thank you so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." i am so excited. we have first lady michelle obama on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] i plan to ask her some serious questions like, "do you think that i could pull off bangs?" [ laughter ] that's right, michelle obama is here. everyone at the white house is excited. in fact, i heard they're even letting biden stay up to watch. isn't that nice? [ laughter ] that's cute, right? he's been good. with the first lady here today there's a lot of additional security around the studio. on my way in i was grabbed, frisked and groped. [ light laughter ] then i was like, "all right, kathie lee, enough. [ laughter ] i have to get to work. i got things to do." [ cheers and applause ] she's an animal. actually michelle obama is actually here tonight to talk about her fitness initiative, "let's move." meanwhile chris christie will be on next week to talk about his initiative, "let's sit." [ laughter ] [ appla
iversal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome, everybody. come on. thank you so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." i am so excited. we have first lady michelle obama on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] i plan to ask her some serious questions like, "do you think that i could pull off bangs?" [ laughter ] that's right, michelle obama is here. everyone at the white house is excited. in fact,...
265
265
Feb 1, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 265
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. oh, that's what i'm talking about right there. that's a great new york city crowd! going crazy. welcome, everyone. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." [ cheers and applause ] that's right. i appreciate it. thank you. welcome. welcome, everybody. welcome. we're going to have fun tonight. here's what people are talking about. the former nfl quarterback, dan marino -- you hear about this? he's admitted to fathering a secret child back in 2005. i don't know why people are surprised. the dolphins never gave him good protection. [ laughter ] check this out. to compete with the super bowl on sunday, tnt is airing a marathon of "law & order" which is -- [ laughter ] i think it's cool, because now viewers have two places to see ray lewis. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] actually, this weekend is not only the super bowl. it is also groundhog day. of course, this year's a little different. if the groundhog sees his shadow, it means six
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. oh, that's what i'm talking about right there. that's a great new york city crowd! going crazy. welcome, everyone. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." [ cheers and applause ] that's right. i appreciate it. thank you. welcome. welcome, everybody. welcome. we're going to have fun tonight. here's what people are talking...
111
111
Feb 26, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 111
favorite 0
quote 0
aid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! that's a welcome. thank you so much. welcome, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] that's so nice. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. [ cheers and applause ] oh, very good. [ cheers and applause ] hot show tonight, gonna be fun. welcome, we're gonna have fun. we're gonna have fun tonight. everyone -- everyone is still talking about the oscars. that's all everyone is talking about. and get this, you guys. last night's show lasted about three hours and 40 minutes. [ scattered cheers ] even jennifer lawrence's dress was like "that's way too long." [ laughter ] did you see this? the entire cast of "les miserables" performed a song from the movie. [ laughter ] the entire cast of -- [ unintelligble french accent ] [ laughter ] they performed a song from the movie. featuring russell crowe. or as the cast of "zero dark thirty" put it, now this is torture. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] too much. i said, i think this is too much. [ applause ] i was watching t
aid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! that's a welcome. thank you so much. welcome, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] that's so nice. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. [ cheers and applause ] oh, very good. [ cheers and applause ] hot show tonight, gonna be fun. welcome, we're gonna have fun. we're gonna have fun tonight. everyone -- everyone is still talking about the oscars....
205
205
Feb 23, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 205
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you very much. thank you. thank you, thank you, thank you. hey, listen to this, folks. al qaeda has issued a list of 22 ways its al qaeda members can avoid being killed by u.s. drones. here's a good one, huh? don't join al qaeda, okay? [ laughter ] try that one. try that one. >> rickey: that's right. >> jay: hey, it's now being reported that since the legalization of marijuana in washington and colorado, the united food and commercial workers union has had over 3,000 marijuana dispensary workers join the union. in fact, the union rallied the other day. they chanted, "what do we want? we can't remember." [ laughter ] "when do we want it? whenever is cool." i mean, it was just -- it's hard to get -- yeah, yeah. [ applause ] oh, boy. well, it is a nice day here in california. a little chilly. but oh, my god, the rest of the country. the weather -- oh, my god.
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you very much. thank you. thank you, thank you, thank you. hey, listen to this, folks. al qaeda has issued a list of 22 ways its al qaeda members can avoid being killed by u.s. drones. here's a good one, huh? don't join al qaeda, okay? [ laughter ] try that one. try that one....
422
422
Feb 14, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 422
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, thank you everyone. welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome, everyone, to "late night with jimmy fallon." thank you for being here. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, everybody. hey, it is past midnight, everybody, which means it's already valentine's day, everybody, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] happy valentine's day. and i heard the trend this year is couples saying they don't need to get each other anything for valentine's day because they love each other every day. [ laughter ] i think that's sweet, yeah. to all the guys out there who watch me, i just want to say -- [ whispers ] -- it's a trap. [ laughter and applause ] buy something tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ] did you guys catch marco rubio's response to the state of the union last night? critics are saying that rubio had a pretty tough time. at one point, he scratched an itch. then, he seemed to wipe his mouth, and he actually reached over and took a sip from a tiny bottle of wate
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, thank you everyone. welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome, everyone, to "late night with jimmy fallon." thank you for being here. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, everybody. hey, it is past midnight, everybody, which means it's already valentine's day, everybody, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] happy valentine's day. and i heard...
378
378
Feb 28, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 378
favorite 0
quote 0
ptions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh. fantastic. welcome, everybody. thank you for being here. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." you guys feeling good? [ cheers and applause ] that's all that matters. >> audience member: i love you! >> jimmy: i love you, too. here's what people are talking about. earlier this week, justin bieber debuted a new tattoo of an "x" on his left arm. yeah. [ light laughter ] first time he's been spotted with an x on his arm since selena gomez. and it's -- [ audience ohs ] they will date again. [ laughter ] i just -- i just heard that nickelodeon is coming out with a spinoff of "dora the explorer" aimed at preschoolers. or, in other words, they finally admitted the original was totally aimed at stoners. [ laughter ] [ as dora ] "can you say argentina?" [ as stoner ] "uh, no." [ laughter ] some more tv news. tlc has renewed its reality show, "breaking amish," for a second season. [ scattered cheers ] yeah. parents of those kids would be so proud if they had any idea what that meant. [ laughter ] this
ptions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh. fantastic. welcome, everybody. thank you for being here. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." you guys feeling good? [ cheers and applause ] that's all that matters. >> audience member: i love you! >> jimmy: i love you, too. here's what people are talking about. earlier this week, justin bieber debuted a new tattoo of an "x" on his left arm. yeah. [ light laughter ] first time...
297
297
Feb 13, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 297
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, thank you very much. that's a great new york city crowd right there. thank you guys so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." here is -- [ cheers and applause ] going to have a fun show tonight. oh, thanks. well, let's get to some of the news stories. here's what people are talking about. with pope benedict retiring in two weeks, more than 100 cardinals will sequester themselves in the sistine chapel to choose the next pope. now, here's what they do. they send out white smoke if they have chosen somebody, black smoke if they haven't chosen somebody. and a text message when they find out it's 2013. [ laughter ] that's what they are going to do. white smoke and black smoke. and this is crazy. did you see this photo? yesterday lightning struck st. peter's basilica just hours after pope benedict announced his resignation. yeah. then the pope said, "i guess that's a 'no' on getting paid for my unused vacation days." [ laughter ] some poli
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, thank you very much. that's a great new york city crowd right there. thank you guys so much. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." here is -- [ cheers and applause ] going to have a fun show tonight. oh, thanks. well, let's get to some of the news stories. here's what people are talking about. with pope benedict retiring in...
509
509
Feb 27, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 509
favorite 0
quote 0
-- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, welcome. that's what i'm talking about. a great new york city crowd. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. [ cheers and applause ] we have a fun show tonight. thank you for watching. here's what people are talking about. manti te'o is apparently one of the slowest linebackers to run the 40-yard dash at the nfl combine yesterday. yeah. you could you tell he took it to heart because today he spent three hours on an imaginary stairmaster. [ laughter ] it gets better. here's some celebrity news. in a new interview kim kardashian said that she and kanye west want to get married, but they are not going to rush it. [ light laughter ] and also because they have to wait until kim kardashian is actually divorced. [ laughter ] that's the little thing. once they get that figured out. [ applause ] this is cool. i read that destiny's child singer michelle williams is getting her own reality show called "my sister's keeper." [ light laughter ] which is better than the show's original title, "
-- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, welcome. that's what i'm talking about. a great new york city crowd. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. [ cheers and applause ] we have a fun show tonight. thank you for watching. here's what people are talking about. manti te'o is apparently one of the slowest linebackers to run the 40-yard dash at the nfl combine yesterday. yeah. you could you tell he took it to heart because...
212
212
Feb 15, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 212
favorite 0
quote 0
captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, everybody. welcome. that's a great new york city crowd, right there. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." oh, my gosh. what a show we have tonight. have a great show. fun one tonight. hey, guys. today was valentine's day. and if you just found that out, that's why you're in trouble. [ laughter ] speaking of valentine's day, though, ikea -- did you hear about this? they are promising to give couples a free crib if they have a baby exactly nine months after valentine's day. [ light laughter ] yeah. getting a free crib is both a great way to save money and the worst "how you were born" story. [ light laughter ] "my parents wanted this crib." did you guys hear about this? taylor swift's ex-boyfriend connor kennedy was arrested yesterday for handcuffing himself to the white house gate to bring attention to climate change. yeah, he's bummed about the arrest, but he's glad to attach himself to something that won't write a song ab
captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, everybody. welcome. that's a great new york city crowd, right there. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." oh, my gosh. what a show we have tonight. have a great show. fun one tonight. hey, guys. today was valentine's day. and if you just found that out, that's why you're in trouble. [ laughter ] speaking of...
168
168
Feb 28, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 168
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much. thank you. welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you very, very much. oh. washington is still going on and on about this whole sequester thing. if you're not sure what it all means, maybe this could explain it to you. picture america as a giant carnival cruise ship. >> rickey: uh-oh. [ light laughter ] >> jay: the captain is fighting with the crew aboard to throw overboard. the rest of us are up to our eyeballs in crap. okay, does that explain it? >> rickey: yep. [ laughter ] >> jay: does that kind of make it a little easier? yeah, yeah. you know, i tell you, even -- [ cheers and applause ] -- even the politicians don't understand what's going on. like today, they asked governor rick perry what he thought of the sequester. and he said, "i think ryan is a a great host on 'american idol.'" see, he doesn't -- [ laughter ] -- they don't quite get it. [ applause ] and let me ask you something. have you notic
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much. thank you. welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you very, very much. oh. washington is still going on and on about this whole sequester thing. if you're not sure what it all means, maybe this could explain it to you. picture america as a giant carnival cruise ship. >> rickey: uh-oh. [ light...
240
240
Feb 15, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 240
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! thank you! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you. and -- thank you. thank you. wow! wow! what a cheap-ass valentine! free tickets to a tv show. [ laughter ] hope you all had a nice valentine's day. hey, here's one of these trivia facts. did you know that on this day in the year 269 a.d., st. valentine was beaten and beheaded? you know why? he forgot valentine's day. that's why. [ laughter ] he forgot -- [ applause ] you know -- on -- on yahoo!, they were giving guys tips on how to buy lingerie for valentine's day. for example, they said if it's too expensive, like, if you buy something too expensive, she'll feel obligated to we
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! thank you! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you. and -- thank you. thank you. wow! wow! what a cheap-ass valentine! free tickets to a tv show. [ laughter ] hope you all had a nice valentine's day. hey, here's one of these trivia facts. did you know that on this day in the year 269 a.d., st. valentine was beaten and...
271
271
Feb 17, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 271
favorite 0
quote 0
. -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com no injuries reported on the ferry. the ferry actually continued on to san francisco after the accident. we have a reporter on the way. and we'll bring you more information just as soon as we get it. >>> a treasure island family has suffered an unimaginable loss. tonight a 10-year-old girl is dead the victim of a raging fire. investigators say she became trapped in a second floor bedroom in her home on mariner avenue. take a look at cell phone video of the fire taken by a neighbor at 12:30 this morning. authorities say six people lived in the apartment and five were able to get out but a 10-year-old was in the second floor calling for help, and firefighters tried to get to her but couldn't reach her. one firefighter suffered a minor injury after the second story floor gave way. the smoke and flames were overwhelming. firefighters say the death has hit them hard. >> anytime we do have a loss, it's a tragedy. kids seem to hurt more because we're all parents. we all seem to have kids. and sometimes, you know, we all do our
. -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com no injuries reported on the ferry. the ferry actually continued on to san francisco after the accident. we have a reporter on the way. and we'll bring you more information just as soon as we get it. >>> a treasure island family has suffered an unimaginable loss. tonight a 10-year-old girl is dead the victim of a raging fire. investigators say she became trapped in a second floor bedroom in her home on mariner avenue. take a look at cell phone...
433
433
Feb 8, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 433
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." it's nice to have you all here. well folks, more bad news for a-rod. oh gosh. looks like there's more evidence linking alex rodriguez to a miami doctor who prescribes performance-enhancing drugs. let me tell you how bad it is for a-rod. he's now favored to win this year's tour de france. [ laughter and applause ] and more bad news or good news, depending on how much you like lance armstrong. he is now under a federal investigation. here's that story. >> a new report that cyclist lance armstrong is now the target of a federal investigation. the crimes the feds are looking into include fraud, conspiracy and obstruction of justi
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." it's nice to have you all here. well folks, more bad news for a-rod. oh gosh. looks like there's more evidence linking alex rodriguez to a miami doctor who prescribes performance-enhancing drugs. let me tell you how bad it is for a-rod. he's now favored to win this year's tour de france. [...
228
228
Feb 1, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 228
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you! thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] thank you! thank you! you all -- you -- [ cheers and applause ] you sound like you're all ready for the super bowl sunday, yeah? [ cheers ] here's some silly super bowl trivia for you. you know to burn the calories in six bottles of beer you would have to do the wave 4200 times. [ light laughter ] of course, the other hand, if you're doing the wave 4200 times you probably drank a a lot more than six bottles of beer. [ laughter ] do you all know where you're gonna watch the game on sunday? [ cheers ] dan marino said he's not sure where he's gonna be to watch
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you! thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] thank you! thank you! you all -- you -- [ cheers and applause ] you sound like you're all ready for the super bowl sunday, yeah? [ cheers ] here's some silly super bowl trivia for you. you know to burn the calories in six bottles of beer...
486
486
Feb 18, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 486
favorite 0
quote 0
. -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com >>> right now at 6:00, a bay area neighborhood on edge after two violent attacks. might be surprised to hear what police are saying about a motive also. >>> what we're doing is providing them with the love and support they need to do the right thing. >> thousands of people hit the streets of san francisco to send the president is message following his state of the union address. >>> and game, set, match. why the tennis tournament known as the s.a.p. open is going away after a century of action here in the bay area. >>> good evening. i'm terry mcswooen knee. >> and i'm diane dwyer. no apparent motive. police are searching for a man they say beat up two women in this district. stephanie, i understand police don't believe robbery or sexual assault was the motive. >> reporter: diane, that's right. police still trying to figure out what would compel a man to do this. walking along bartlett and 23rd and got physical with a woman walking past him. you can look at the sketch they just released of this man. he actually tried to punch this
. -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com >>> right now at 6:00, a bay area neighborhood on edge after two violent attacks. might be surprised to hear what police are saying about a motive also. >>> what we're doing is providing them with the love and support they need to do the right thing. >> thousands of people hit the streets of san francisco to send the president is message following his state of the union address. >>> and game, set, match. why the tennis...
313
313
Feb 22, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 313
favorite 0
quote 0
captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] that's what i'm talking about. that's the fun, that's the love, i feel the love right there. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. >> hey, jimmy. >> jimmy: hey, guys. it's going to be a fun show tonight. we're going to have a good time. here's what people are talking about. you guys, it was just announced that president obama will speak at ohio state's graduation in may. which should be great. i mean, the president has a lot in common with those students. he's currently in his fifth year and swamped in debt. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] perfect. have you heard about this? officials in pakistan are complaining about the movie "zero dark thirty" contains a lot of errors about the country. they were like. [ in pakistani accent ] the movie makes pakistan out to be a hellish wasteland of corruption and intolerance, but in real life it is way worse than that. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it's like watching a
captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] that's what i'm talking about. that's the fun, that's the love, i feel the love right there. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. >> hey, jimmy. >> jimmy: hey, guys. it's going to be a fun show tonight. we're going to have a good time. here's what people are talking about. you guys, it was...
113
113
Feb 22, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 113
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! thank you, guys. [ cheers and applause ] thanks, everybody. welcome to "the tonight show." oh, boy. hey, have you heard about this? this is all over the place. a mother in new york state now facing possible jail time after she allegedly hired two strippers to perform at her son's 16th birthday party. [ audience ohs ] >> rickey: oh. >> jay: but, to be fair, you know, a lot of kids are afraid of clowns, you know? so, you go to go -- >> rickey: yep. >> jay: a lot of kids get very nervous, yeah. no, even worse is grandma put 100 singles in his birthday card so the kid could make it rain. that's wrong. [ audience ohs ] >> rickey: oh. >> jay: i think you're starting too young. [ applause ] and this -- this all took place at a a bowling alley. they had the birthday party at a bowling alley. see, i think the mom is setting her son up for a huge disappointment later in life. i mean, let's be honest. is there anybody you ever wanted to see naked in
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! thank you, guys. [ cheers and applause ] thanks, everybody. welcome to "the tonight show." oh, boy. hey, have you heard about this? this is all over the place. a mother in new york state now facing possible jail time after she allegedly hired two strippers to perform at her son's 16th birthday party. [ audience ohs ] >>...
161
161
Feb 26, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 161
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: hi, guys. thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you. well, first off -- [ cheers and applause ] congratulations to our good friend, ben affleck. "argo" won the academy award. best picture, yes. [ cheers and applause ] very happy for ben. yeah. man, that makes the second time lincoln has had a bad experience in the theater. that's the second time. [ laughter ] michelle obama announced the winner for best picture last night from the white house. that came as a surprise. but, you know, something happened. i thought maybe -- i thought this was a bit rude. take a look. >> mrs. obama, do you have your envelope? >> and the oscar goes to -- [ drumroll ] >> "argo." [ laughter and applause ] >> jay: wow. and "life of pi" took home four oscars. it's about a young boy trapped at sea on a small boat with a a man-eating tiger.
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: hi, guys. thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you. well, first off -- [ cheers and applause ] congratulations to our good friend, ben affleck. "argo" won the academy award. best picture, yes. [ cheers and applause ] very happy for ben. yeah. man, that makes the second time...
149
149
Feb 14, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 149
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you very much. well folks, in just 25 minutes, we celebrate valentine's day. how about that? [ cheers ] or as manti te'o calls it, april fool's day. [ light laughter ] as you know, valentine's day is named after st. valentine. do you know who he was? he was the patron saint of sexual extortion. [ laughter ] and did you know this? listen to this. we live in a free country, but valentine's day is banned in iran. they banned valentine's day. so, you can tell guys are running that country. yeah. [ laughter ] that's right. get out of here. a lot of romance surveys in the paper today. according to this latest one,
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you very much. well folks, in just 25 minutes, we celebrate valentine's day. how about that? [ cheers ] or as manti te'o calls it, april fool's day. [ light laughter ] as you know, valentine's day is named after st. valentine. do you know who he was? he was the patron saint...
141
141
Feb 12, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 141
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." well, folks. thank you, thank you! the grammy results are in, and the score is katy perry cleavage -- one, cbs censors -- zero! zero! [ laughter ] well, as you may have heard, cbs asked the performers at the grammys last night to adhere to strict a dress code of no gratuitous displays of flesh. that's what they said. well, sure, after all, this is a network of wholesome family programming like the -- what's that? prance around in your underpants victoria's secret special. yeah, you know. [ laughter ] oh, and talk about hypocritical. cbs -- this is another thing they said -- they didn't want anyone to emphasize their genitals. [ light laughter ] did you see what they did during wiz khalifa's performance?
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." well, folks. thank you, thank you! the grammy results are in, and the score is katy perry cleavage -- one, cbs censors -- zero! zero! [ laughter ] well, as you may have heard, cbs asked the performers at the grammys last night to adhere to strict a dress code of no gratuitous displays of...
219
219
Feb 5, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 219
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! that's what i'm talking about. welcome, everyone. thank you so much. welcome. thank you so much, everybody. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." we're going to have fun tonight. super bowl, did you love it? [ cheers ] it was great, right? everyone's talking about this. the super bowl was last night, and it was one of the highest-rated super bowls ever, with 108 million people watching. plus, i read that this year's game added $430 million to the new orleans economy. none of which apparently was used to pay the electric bill. [ laughter ] that was weird. [ cheers and applause ] that's a weird deal. last night, the lights in the superdome went out for 33 minutes at the beginning of the third quarter. yeah, the 49ers were just standing around the field not knowing what to do, and then the blackout happened. >> steve: right. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, the lights went out in the third quarter. it was weird because no
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! that's what i'm talking about. welcome, everyone. thank you so much. welcome. thank you so much, everybody. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." we're going to have fun tonight. super bowl, did you love it? [ cheers ] it was great, right? everyone's talking about this. the super bowl was last night, and it was one of the...
182
182
Feb 27, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 182
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you here. folks, listen to this. got an exciting story. researchers in germany now say that human longevity has improved so rapidly over the past century that 72 is the new 30. [ laughter ] no, they say the way we are aging, an 86-year-old today could live another 40 years. to which hugh hefner's new wife went, "no! no!" [ laughter ] wow. how about -- [ cheers and applause ] so, 72 is the new 30, which is bad news for parents. you'll never get the kids out of the house now. [ laughter ] "dad, i'm only 50. that's, like, 17." [ laughter ] do you believe any of that? longevity has improved so rapidly, 72 is the new 30? please. who's 72 and still thinks they're 30? okay, besides jack nicholson. who -- besides jack nicholson. [ laughter ] did you see jack nicholson
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you here. folks, listen to this. got an exciting story. researchers in germany now say that human longevity has improved so rapidly over the past century that 72 is the new 30. [ laughter ] no, they say the way we are aging, an 86-year-old today could live another 40 years. to...
181
181
Feb 20, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 181
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! welcome! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] nice to have you all here. thank you very much! well, here is something interesting. according to a report in "the journal on neuroscience," the most unpleasant sound in the world is a knife blade being scraped across a glass bottle. that is considered the most unpleasant sound in the world -- up 'til last week. now it's, "welcome aboard your carnival cruise." [ laughter ] "nice to have you all with us." that is the most unpleasant -- [ applause ] well, folks, you knew this was going to happen. dozens and dozens of lawsuits have already been filed against criminal -- i mean, carnival -- [ laughter ] carnival -- carnival cruise. well, if you thought the ship was filthy, slimy and disgusting, wait until these lawyers get involved. [ laughter ] oh, my goodness. well, a new poll says that 92% of pakistanis dislike americans.
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you! welcome! welcome to "the tonight show." thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] nice to have you all here. thank you very much! well, here is something interesting. according to a report in "the journal on neuroscience," the most unpleasant sound in the world is a knife blade being scraped across a glass bottle. that...
146
146
Feb 19, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 146
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you, thank you! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] well, happy -- happy presidents' day, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] now, don't -- don't confuse that with vice presidents' day. that's also known as april fool's day. that's a totally different -- [ audience oohs ] well, let's see what's going on. yesterday, president obama played golf in florida with tiger woods. well, you thought michelle got
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you, thank you! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] well, happy -- happy presidents' day, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] now, don't -- don't confuse that with vice presidents' day. that's also known as april fool's day. that's a totally different...
356
356
Feb 20, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 356
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm talking about. [ cheers and applause ] welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. welcome. that's a great new york city crowd right there. thank you for coming out tonight. [ cheers and applause ] here's what people are talking about, everyone. "sports illustrated" swimsuit model kate upton just announced that she recently became single. [ scattered cheers ] so to all those guys out there who have been waiting for a chance with kate upton, you still don't have a chance with kate upton. [ light laughter ] some more entertainment news. in his new memoir, 80-year-old music mogul, clive davis reveals that he's bisexual. [ light cheers ] or as he put it, "hey, sometimes you gotta listen to both sides of the record, you know?" [ laughter ] yeah. 80-year-old clive davis revealed that he is bisexual. which is smart because if you're still trying to have sex when you're 80, you should really take whatever you can get. i mean,
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm talking about. [ cheers and applause ] welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. welcome. that's a great new york city crowd right there. thank you for coming out tonight. [ cheers and applause ] here's what people are talking about, everyone. "sports illustrated" swimsuit model kate upton just...
123
123
Feb 2, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 123
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jay: welcome! thank you very much. thank you! welcome, super bowl fans! yes! yes! [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. hey, listen to this. listen to this. i saw this on the news today. if you're going to buy any super bowl memorabilia, the nfl just announced they seized $3.5 million worth of fake nfl goods. a lot of counterfeit jerseys, counterfeit hats, all this stuff. you know the way you can tell the merchandise is fake? look for these five words. "super bowl champion cleveland browns." okay, if it says that -- [ laughter ] -- you know, you know. [ applause ] well, this weekend, people all across america will devour
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jay: welcome! thank you very much. thank you! welcome, super bowl fans! yes! yes! [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. hey, listen to this. listen to this. i saw this on the news today. if you're going to buy any super bowl memorabilia, the nfl just announced they seized $3.5 million worth of fake nfl goods. a lot of counterfeit jerseys,...
213
213
Feb 7, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 213
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you! welcome! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have -- thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] hey, you know -- here's something you never think about. you know, before the super bowl was played, you know, they make up the super bowl champion jerseys and hats for both teams. they make thousands of them for
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you! welcome! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have -- thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] hey, you know -- here's something you never think about. you know, before the super bowl was played, you know, they make up the super bowl champion jerseys and hats for both teams. they make thousands of them for
193
193
Feb 9, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 193
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much. thank you. thank you very much. nice to have you all here. thank you. thank you. well, as you know there is a -- oh, my god. just a huge snowstorm going on back east. i hope everybody is doing okay. i now some folks have lost power back east. so, good luck to them. you know, i spoke to my buddy in boston. they've already gotten a ton of snow in boston. he said massachusetts is now whiter than a romney family reunion. that's how much snow. [ rim shot ] hey, but and some people -- some people love the snow. i'll tell ya, martha stewart today. did you see her on the news? she built a snowman whose eyes were natural black onyx and whose nose was a caramelized roasted baby carrot sprinkled with thyme. beautiful. beautiful, beautiful snowman. well here is an interesting statistic, folks. listen to this. no, that's not interesting. forget that. forget this. you know what i was going to
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much. thank you. thank you very much. nice to have you all here. thank you. thank you. well, as you know there is a -- oh, my god. just a huge snowstorm going on back east. i hope everybody is doing okay. i now some folks have lost power back east. so, good luck to them. you know, i spoke to my buddy in boston. they've already gotten a...
119
119
Feb 21, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 119
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much. welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you. and welcome to another edition of "politicians behaving badly." i love these stories. >> rickey: oh, here it comes. >> jay: the former senator pete domenici, of new mexico revealed today that while in office he fathered a child with the daughter of another senator who was a friend of his. >> rickey: oh! >> jay: now, are you following me on this? now, he cheated on his wife with a daughter of another senator, and they had a baby. when did the senate become "the jerry springer show"? [ laughter ] when did that happen? [ applause ] and i love that -- i love this part. domenici is defending himself by saying that he is no better or worse than the next guy. and he's right, 'cause you know who the next guy was? john edwards. [ laughter ] that's why. that's why. [ applause ] and the -- and the former san diego mayor, a woman named maureen o'connor,
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much. welcome to "the tonight show." thank you. thank you. and welcome to another edition of "politicians behaving badly." i love these stories. >> rickey: oh, here it comes. >> jay: the former senator pete domenici, of new mexico revealed today that while in office he fathered a child with the daughter of...
181
181
Feb 5, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 181
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you! welcome! thank you! welcome to the super bowl post game show. well, the big super bowl story -- deer antler spray works, how
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you! welcome! thank you! welcome to the super bowl post game show. well, the big super bowl story -- deer antler spray works, how
146
146
Feb 6, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 146
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: oh! thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] thank you! welcome! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you! thank you! oh! well, i guess you know people still are trying to figure out why the power went out sunday at the super bowl. today, they found out the reason. turns out china cut off the electricity for nonpayment of our bill. that's what it is. [ laughter ] shut it off. shut it down. that's it! well, cbs is now facing a a possible fine because ravens quarterback joe flacco was overheard dropping the f-bomb on the air. he said the f-word. did you hear it? you probably heard it. well, cbs is arguing they could not have foreseen this happening. you know, someone on the ravens breaking the law who isn't
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: oh! thank you very much! [ cheers and applause ] thank you! welcome! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you all here. thank you! thank you! oh! well, i guess you know people still are trying to figure out why the power went out sunday at the super bowl. today, they found out the reason. turns out china cut off the electricity for...
597
597
Feb 13, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 597
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you here. well, earlier tonight, president obama gave his state of the union address. you know what i love? at every state of the union address, the president is always introduced by some guy who walks in and goes, "mr. speaker, the president of the united states!" you know, if we're really serious about reducing the size of government, start with that guy, okay? [ laughter ] i mean, what does he work? one day a year? you know, joe biden's got nothing to do. let him introduce the president. we're already paying him. exactly. [ cheers and applause ] actually, do you know why the white house scheduled the state of the union address for lincoln's birthday today instead of washington's birthday? >> rickey: no. >> jay: well, it's because washington was famous for saying, "i cannot tell a lie."
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television captions by vitac www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you very much! thank you very much! welcome to "the tonight show." nice to have you here. well, earlier tonight, president obama gave his state of the union address. you know what i love? at every state of the union address, the president is always introduced by some guy who walks in and goes, "mr. speaker, the president of the...
195
195
Feb 2, 2013
02/13
by
KNTV
tv
eye 195
favorite 0
quote 0
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yes, thank you. that's what i'm talking about. welcome. welcome, everybody. oh, welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everyone. you guys feeling good tonight? [ cheers and applause ] everyone's good. here's what people are talking about. the super bowl is on sunday. yeah. [ cheers and applause ] the super bowl, the biggest thing in the whole wide world. yeah, you guys excited about the super bowl or you don't care? [ cheers and applause ] both teams are already in new orleans. they're getting ready for the big game and, during their practice yesterday, the 49ers actually piped in fake crowd noise to simulate the loud conditions for sunday's game. fake crowd noise or at manti te'o put it, "they sounded real to me." [ laughter and applause ] and i was like, well, that's -- [ cheers and applause ] why are you -- why are they asking him? this is interesting. a new survey found that 27% of americans think god plays a role in who wins the super bow
[ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yes, thank you. that's what i'm talking about. welcome. welcome, everybody. oh, welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everyone. you guys feeling good tonight? [ cheers and applause ] everyone's good. here's what people are talking about. the super bowl is on sunday. yeah. [ cheers and applause ] the super bowl, the biggest thing...